Sixty-Two

Sixty-Two Years

What an odd feeling to be eligible for Social Security. I thought that program was for old farts? In any case, I'm there, and one day soon, provided I don't wake up to find my obituary posted, I'll mosey on down to the SSA office, have a leetle chat with the fine folks there, and see what's available. It's equally odd to think that I could have the Uncle of Sam send me a check each month just for my continued skill at breathing. But then I have been practicing for quite some time, admittedly. And there are a passel of folks who have stopped practicing their inspirational skills, and the Guv'mint has withheld their funds, so...

Things are changing. In my 62 years on the planet I didn't think I'd see such scientific whiz-bang stuff as space travel that's best described as boring, internet conductivity that has erased every distance known to man, or woman, or child. I never expected to see a man of color in the white-washed president's house in DC, and they tell me a woman might could live there at some point as well. A woman! Imagine it. Medical science proceeds by chunks instead of nips, as hearts are stalled for repairs, like turning off the ignition and gawking under the hood, then cranked back up again. Next thing you know they'll have us doing our own CPR. Cheaper and more effective, they'll say. Who has most to lose? Reasonably soon we'll be able to stop those nasty bugs that insist on mooching off of us from duplicating by interrupting their communication link with each other. Did you know bacteria talk to each other? Neither did I, but they do. We're gonna be able to cancel their cell phone contracts, so they'll have nothing but dropped calls, sort'a like us!

But the really sensational news is that we are indeed moving toward a new understanding of what equal rights really means in America. As I write this, a judge has ruled in Boston that Federal Defense Of Marriage Act is unconstitutional. Hopefully, before I shuffle off to that big dirt nap, I will see civil marriage equality as the law of the land. It's coming, America. And here's the thing: when LGBT people are able to marry, the sun will still rise in the East, cows will still give milk, Niagara Falls will continue falling, chickens will lay eggs, Republicans will still say no to everything, Democrats will still be hopelessly disorganized and life will go on without so much as a whimper or a snort. It will be the biggest Ho-Hum in history. You heard it here first.